Have you ever had one of those movie moments? Things are going so right, the sun is shining, and there is even a soundtrack?

I had one of those moments today. My training got out early so I was able to take an early train home (see, in the end it was a good thing I missed my train at my station and had to drive to the one with the meters ... this early train didn't go to my normal station). The sun was shining, there were people all around, and there was a guy playing a great beat on a drum set right in the middle of it all.

It was one of those YESSSssss moments

Lately, my work days are a struggle.

I go in late, because there's not much to do, and I can. But, I feel guilty about it and check my email and phone messages in the mornings before leaving home so I'm up to speed when I get in. That makes me feel better for a bit. I love having some extra time in the mornings, but then I half worry on the train when my book isn't holding my attention and my mind wanders.

There's stuff to do with no deadline and lots of unpacking and it's so de-motivating once I get in there.

I've got a great job now, that will be great for me. I need to grasp my tasks, finish them, and then make room to make this job my own. It's tough, the girl before me was the first one in this job, and she did it for 6 years. She's great and has been massively helpful. Before, in my last job, there was a need to do things the same way the girl before me had done them. But now, I have the opportunity to bring my skills & ideas to the tables and perhaps improve things, or at the very least to make them my own.

It's a challenge. Let's see how it goes.

I have become a huge wimp. Ever since we put in our air conditioners, little tiny bugs have appeared on our walls & ceiling. They're tiny and I envisioned them falling on me in my sleep and thus made Tim climb around squishing them in Kleenex. I don't know exactly when I became too much of a wimp to do it myself.

This morning, there was some kind of large bug (like 1") with antennae and a hard shell body (you could just tell). I tried to squish him under a book on the carpet but every time I checked he was still wriggling. It was the worst. I was suddenly hit with guilt. Some how, the size of this bug, and kiling it myself made me feel guilty, and I definitely couldn't squish him in Kleenex, ewwww.

There's a lot going on. Making wedding progress... signed up for two excersise classes through community ed ... my office is moving. I even, dare I say it, feel happy. I didn't expect to, especially considering how crummy I felt 2 weeks ago. Maybe I dealt with what I needed to then.

Work has been going well. This new job I started in March was the best thing ever. I feel like it's a real job, with real responsibilities. Not that the past 2 weren't, but I guess this one's just a good fit and I can say "yeah I do this." It's mostly independent, and working with a small (15?) group of students. My boss is totally laidback and has a thousand other things going on so as long as things are going smoothly for me, and getting done, he focuses his attention on the other 999 things he's got going on. It's just good. I'm moving my office Thursday which is sort of a daunting task (which I have, of course been procrastinating on). Luckily, once I mail out the boxes of stuff filling my floor space, I just need to dump files into boxes (my predecessor cleaned and organized thoroughly before leaving). One fun thing is I'm not actually moving anything, as opposed to moving apartments, so there's none of that "hmmm can I lift this?" worry.

Had dinner with an old friend last night. We reminisced about college.... I think the best thing was just having all of your close friends living close by. It's so strange now to be spread out and have to make plans 2 weeks in advance to see each other. Oh well .... at least we do, right?

Man, I would LOVE it if I still got summer vacation. That was the best.

I'm in a place right now where I'm very easily sucked into a slump. Feeling crappy, don't wanna do anything, definitely don't want to go to work (even though I like my job). Gotta fight it! Take my vitamins (especially the "b"s), make plans, get out.

It's just hard to believe it's almost been a year. It's strange to suddenly find myself feeling overly emotional and sensitive.

It feels good being kind of productive with the wedding stuff. Makes me feel a little more motivated.

I'm totally re-hooked on reading. It took me the better part of a year to get through Love in a Time of Cholera. (Sidenote--remember Serendipity? It's the book she puts the note in). Not that it wasn't good, I just wasn't all that interested in picking it up. Normally if a book wasn't holding my attention, I'd swap to another one for a bit, but I wasn't feeling it. Then suddenly I cruised through the rest of it, read Julie & Julia in a matter of days (very fun book, maybe me really want my own project, or to take a class--something!), read Postcards on vacation (interesting/different) and now I'm nearly finished with the Mermaid Chair.

I think my new voracity for books is also partly due to my now being hooked on the train. I love taking the train to work. It's so easy, even when I don't get the express, I love it. My trip is quick and smooth and there's no traffic and 90% of the time the train is right on schedule.

Things are good.

Adrienne and I are talking book swap. What should I read next?

WOW

So much has happened.

I totally lost my steam back in February. My dad got sick and was in the hospital for a month, home for a month or so, and had another surgery a few weeks ago. He's doing a lot better and life is finally starting to feel normal again.

The other big news is that Tim and I are engaged. In mid-April on a rainy Wednesday he completely surprised me by insisting we go to dinner in Boston, refusing to tell me where we were going, insisting we walk through the Public Gardens, and popping the question right before dinner and took me to the Stanhope to celebrate. A spectacular night. We've already set the date and are planning for the wedding. We've got a blog on the subject. Check it out at jenandtimgetmarried.blogspot.com. Starting that got me thinking about picking this up again.

So here I am.

Let's see what's to come.

2007 ... finally feeling better. The new apartment is great. I like living in the boonies. I like that there's no hassle, we're a straight shot from the east, easy to get to from everywhere, and we're no more than a half hour from anywhere we want to be ... well except to see Tim's family, but at least we're a solid half hour or 45 minutes closer to them. I like our bigger apartment and that our parents and friends like it, too. I don't even mind that I get up at 630 (give or take) everyday. We are here, and we're settling in, and I love it.

We have nice, friendly neighbors who give us hot tips on x-country ski spots. People hold the doors open. There are hardly any lights and even when there's traffic it doesn't feel like it. And, gosh darnit, we've got the littlest "big K" you'll ever see!

Surprising as it may seem, I constantly forget how important it is to have a good cry, a really good one.

I hate waiting ... does that make me impatient?

I'm very excited for our move to the boonies ... to a bonafide 2 bedroom apartment with 4 - 6 outlets in each room, all 3 pronged. Seems so simple, yet I am so excited to get there, to start the next phase, get everything set up, rehang our photos, hang the prints we never put up because we were never really happy with our current place.

The "next phase" ... it should be good. god, I hope it is. I need a good year, we all do. So many changes for others, too, friends moving away, friends that have moved will be feeling settled ... and what lies ahead for 2007 and this next phase? Only good things I hope!

I am home today, sick. Sick because I woke up exhausted for about the millionth (not really) day in a row. But seriously, all last week, exhausted. Not sleepy, not lazy -- fatigued, tired, wiped out. I woke up, thought "ugh", felt how congested my head was, thought "ugh" again. Got up to pee, saw the rain, thought ugh ugh ugh. Laid in bed, thought about it, knew there was no way I could be productive, thought about how crummy I felt. Called out of work, called Tim. Laid awake a few minutes then passed out (by now it was 750 a.m. or so), and slept until 945.

I don't stay up late, I haven't been doing anything crazy. In all I slept 10 hours or so between last night and 945 this a.m. Ridiculous. I feel better, enough to have a pang of guilt and think of going to the office, but I also seem to have no appetite so it's prob. best to take a decongestant and stay home. I'm eating a pear. It's making my mouth feel dry, which is a weird sensation.

So here we are, 2007 is finally here. Scratch 2006 from the books.

This pic is our $12 6' Christmas tree, not bad right?

A good weekend in CT at Katie's parents' house. Lost $20 at the casino, and had a great time. Spent 2 nights there, Saturday with Katie, Will, Mo, Vin, Tim & I. Sunday Beth & Mike and Murph & Kara joined. Hot tub, sauna, and too much food had by all!

I'm dreading work tomorrow, but am thankful that I straightened up the apartment Friday, so we didn't come home to a mess!